Understanding ADHD in the Context of Anti-Social Behaviour (ASB)
It’s estimated that 1 in 20 people have ADHD. The process of diagnosis is long and arduous, and the condition, particularly in adult women, is little understood. This means you are likely to know or work with someone who has the condition, whether they are diagnosed or even aware of it. As an ASB officer, this could include people experiencing ASB.
I am that 1 in 20 person with ADHD, having received a late diagnosis in 2022. As a partner at Green & Burton ASB, and a business leader for many years, this diagnosis is something that profoundly impacted me on so many levels, and today I want to share with you some of the journey of discovery about the condition and how it can manifest itself. As part of this exploration it has also led me to consider how it would affect me if I were unfortunate enough to find myself a victim of ASB. What might be particularly challenging for me about the “normal” case management process? What reasonable adjustments might be appropriate to help me access the service? This article is designed to share some of these thoughts. I must caveat this by saying that ADHD affects different people in different ways. What would help me may not be the same for others. That said, I hope it gives you food for thought.
Understanding ADHD in the Context of Anti-Social Behaviour (ASB)
Justice Sensitivity
Justice sensitivity causes you to perceive unfairness and wrongdoing more frequently and to feel it more acutely. You may become enraged by things that you don’t believe to be fair, even if others see them as relatively minor issues. For example, someone cutting into a queue may send you into a rage.
Justice sensitivity can be a common trait in those with ADHD. If I am a victim or witness of ASB, I am likely to be more angry or upset by this. It will appear extremely unjust to me that someone who has done nothing wrong is being harmed. This may mean that I make repeated and regular contact with my ASB officer, fuelled by my need to see justice being done. If the outcome of the officer’s investigation is that no action can be taken, perhaps because there isn’t enough evidence, I am likely to find this a difficult message to receive.
How to support someone who is demonstrating justice sensitivity:
Please don’t put me in the persistent complainant’s box or think that I am simply being intolerant or unreasonable. Make sure to take the time to keep me updated and to clearly explain to me the reason behind a decision I may not like. ADHD also makes me a great problem solver and creative thinker – knowing why makes a huge difference to how I respond to things!
Conflict and Difficult Conversations
I really struggle with conflict and having difficult conversations. Rejection sensitivity dysphoria (being sensitive to anything that could be perceived as a criticism) means that I am a massive people pleaser. A difficult conversation will likely involve saying something to someone they do not want to hear, meaning that they are likely to think poorly of me. I also don’t ever want to hurt anyone, yet I can respond impulsively, with extreme emotions. I can also speak before I think. This can lead to me saying things that I regret. Things that I then ruminate over for months and years, feeling guilty that I may have upset the person on the receiving end. I may also not stand up for myself, for fear of upsetting the other person, leading to me compromising my position.
The concept, therefore, of speaking to my neighbour about concerns I may have, say about the volume of their TV, will be something I am very resistant to. I am not saying this shouldn’t be offered to me where it is appropriate and in my best interest – I am a big believer that I should not completely avoid things I find challenging, rather work to find ways of making it more comfortable – rather that I may need a little more help from you. I may need suggested wording on how to approach, practical advice about what to do, or alternative options that aren’t as scary, such as writing to my neighbour.
How to make adjustments for someone with RSD:
If you want me to undertake mediation, then please consider that I might be concerned, anxious, and frightened about doing so, because of my aversion to conflict and difficult conversations. Are there things that can be done to make me feel more comfortable? For example, giving me more time to think over the prospect before agreeing, allowing me more time to prepare for the sessions, building a relationship with the mediator, bringing someone along as a supporter, etc.
Likewise, if you want me to go to court as a first-hand witness then I will definitely need support and assistance. Please travel with me or make sure there is someone at the entrance of the court to meet me. This is going to massively increase my likelihood of both showing up, and presenting information as expected, reducing the risk of struggling during proceedings.
Extreme Emotions
Those with ADHD can feel emotions hard and fast. We may respond to things immediately and with a great deal of force. Some people with ADHD may have a condition called Dysthymia – which is a condition which can affect mood over a long time which can exacerbate the impact of extreme emotions too.
How might this play out in an ASB case…
If you are my officer and you tell me something that I might be disappointed to hear, even if to you it seems very minor, please don’t take it personally if you receive an immediate response, expressing disappointment or anger that seems disproportionate. Please don’t class me as an unreasonable complainant. There is every chance I will regret that email within seconds of sending it. You may even receive a contrite follow-up with an apology.
ADHD Affecting Levels Of Organisation
ADHD affects executive functioning. This is our ability to manage our thoughts, emotions, and actions. It plays out in different ways for different people but can often display itself as forgetfulness or disorganisation. I do not wish to disclose how many bank cards, driving licences, etc., that I have misplaced for fear of your judgement!
How someone with ADHD whose organisation levels are affected can manifest:
Give me diary sheets to complete, and I will lose them. An incident may occur, and I won’t be able to find the sheets to record accurately the details. I am then likely to forget, leaving the matter completely undocumented. Or I may scribble the details down on a random piece of paper.
Smartphone apps or sending an email are likely to be much more suitable means of reporting for me.
If you do require me to make written notes, please don’t hold it against me if these are freeform, rather than in the diary sheets that you provided to me. Don’t tell me that these are unacceptable forms of evidence (they are) or that I need to be using the diary sheets for you to be able to assess the issue and take action (you don’t).
Oh, and life admin? Terrible at it. Those diary sheets you need me to complete? If I haven’t misplaced them, then I certainly won’t remember to return them to you. I’m not being difficult. It’s not because the problem has stopped. Yes, it may seem illogical. My brain just doesn’t work the same as yours.
Supporting a victim of antisocial behaviour (ASB) with ADHD and executive functioning issues requires a thoughtful approach:
- Listen and Validate: Acknowledge their feelings and experiences.
- Simplify Tasks: Break down tasks into manageable steps.
- Reminders: Set up reminders for important tasks and appointments.
- Support Network: Help them connect with friends, family, or support groups.
- Assist with Communication: Help draft letters or practise difficult conversations.
- Advocacy: Educate them on their rights and support them in advocating for themselves.
- Skill Development: Encourage time management and organisational tools.
- Reporting ASB: Help with documenting incidents
- Encourage Self-care: Remind them to care for their physical and mental health.
Introversion
I never fail to surprise people when I explain that I am a huge introvert. I struggle in large groups and with people I don’t know. I have simply become exceptionally good at masking and appearing otherwise. I recognise that sometimes my aversion could be perceived as rudeness. I may be quiet, withdrawn, can cancel events at the last minute, and look like I’m not listening. It’s not you, it’s me.
I also hate telephone calls. Nothing is worse than someone calling “for a chat”. In my mind, you should always call for a reason, give that reason, and then end the call without delay.
Please don’t have a system where I can only report ASB by telephone – I won’t. It doesn’t mean the problems have stopped. But, surely, if the issue was bad enough, she would call (I hear you say). Nope. You call me, and I don’t answer. You leave a voicemail, and I don’t return your call. It doesn’t mean I have stopped engaging, it doesn’t mean the harm has stopped, it doesn’t mean the case should be closed.
How to communicate?
Simple. Email me.
Understanding ADHD in the Context of Anti-Social Behaviour (ASB)
I totally understand that some of the above is going to be really difficult to understand. Objectively, I can see that it might appear illogical, senseless, or obstructive. But please stop applying the way you would think and act as the benchmark of how I should be behaving. My brain works a little differently, and trust me, it can be incredibly frustrating for me too.
Recently we hosted a webinar which discussed this topic and released some helpful resources on the topic – click below to access them!